I think. Therefore, I am confused. Fill your eyes, ears and mind with thoughts, rantings, historical references, stories, quotes and music. Read. Absorb. Learn. Grow. It's a daily experience. Learning concepts, ideas, and principles that make meaning in your life, is a spiritual quest. Wasting time on senseless crap like useless social media postings, stupid video postings and other mindless crap wastes your time, your mind and your soul. Enrich yourselves with all the world has to offer to make you a better person and make our communities better, safer places.
These original poems reflect my many years from the emo teen, twenty-something sexual exploration and identification, Marxist rebellion, lost love, parenthood, aging without grace, pre-mid life crisis, post-mid life crisis, and my coming death. Nothing wrong with emotional, mental, sexual, and spiritual upheavals. We are put into situations that make us think deeply. It is that thinking that brings on our depression, at times, our mental instability but also our artistic purges. I think, therefore, I am utterly confused.
Under Siege
2025
This is the pride of humanity,
when leaders side with insanity.
You can’t try to hide
behind the lies
when there is a genocide.
You can spin, spin, spin the story
with all the glory
but it still falls
under the same category
of genocide.
A mere mockery of your history.
From the river to the sea, a new humanity.
Never
1997
You never write me poetry.
You never send me chocolate.
You never tell me your dreams.
You never whisper sweet nothings in my ear.
I couldn’t give more love,
if time came to an end,
if winds cease to blow,
if stars dropped from the skies.
My days turn to nights.
The nights go on forever.
I feel like forever I lay lonely
without you.
I grasp for something,
for anything,
that reminds me of you,
but you are not present.
Cool waters could not wash away
my desire,
my craving,
my love.
We are our darkest kept secrets
at a moment when
I want to express
the burning of my soul
to world around me.
You never write me poetry.
I never want to stop loving you.
Never.
False Idols
2025
How do you canonize
a racist who preyed
upon others
while distorting the good word?
How do you martyr
a crazed mind who felt
gun murders
gave credence to gun rights?
How do you celebrate
a blathering fool
seeking to rile audiences,
who held no sense of decency
for those who were different.
How do you memorialize
a white supremacist
by sounding the horn against foes,
by demanding vigilante justice
against perceived enemies.
Smells like hate,
nothing but hate.
A narrow vision
feeding upon division,
utter derision,
not to be outdone
by other racists brethren.
Sold Again
2025
You stood by a racist,
for a racist,
with a racist.
What did you hope to gain?
He wants to wipe the slate clean,
make our history pristine.
Eliminate African American History.
Portray slavery as a good process
that gave your ancestors
skills, housing and food.
Erase slavery, racism, lynching,
to paint the past
as nothing more
than a list of achievements.
Meanwhile,
the forts once again
proudly proclaim the names
of slave holders,
defenders of slavery,
traitors to humanity.
Among these racists,
you find salvation?
It is an aberration that you
proudly voice your capitulation
in celebration of life
on the Grand Old Plantation.
You are treading in dark waters.
Betraying your sons and daughters.
This is the legacy you seek to leave,
living when you are being deceived,
betraying the memories of civil rights,
to show allegiance to these whites.
Suddenly
1997
Suddenly,
a fear overcomes me
as the hands race
around the clock.
Suddenly,
I feel alone.
I feel like crying.
Suddenly,
an emptiness rings
through my heart,
through my veins.
Suddenly,
I see visions
of autumn days,
grey and cool,
falling leaves.
Suddenly,
I find myself
yearning for warmth
as I lay in a fetal position.
Suddenly,
I think of you,
somewhere,
somewhere.
I just do not know where.
A special thanx to the high school teachers in my youth. Ms. Soelter encouraged me to find myself in the written and spoken word. She inspired me to write, to think deeply about the mysteries of life, love, death, spirituality and the universe. Mr. Kulieke showed me an appreciation for science and how the universe and nature work in harmony. Ms. Maslow amazed me with the beauty of numbers and mathematics. All these enriched my soul, made me think, gave me reason to question and led to many years of therapy. Still, I search for meaning, answers and purpose in the final stage of my life.